Why you should do exactly what you want to do

When I first learned to remove the phrase ‘I should…’ from my vocabulary and replace it with ‘I want to…’ it was confusing at first, to think I could just do whatever I wanted, how does that lead to me living a better life? But this advice is not about doing whatever you want moment to moment. Instead, think about what you truly want to be doing going forward. Rather than thinking about today, think about tomorrow or next week or next year. What do you want to have spent your time doing? Because the moment can be clouded by habit, mood, convenience, dopamine and a load of other variables. Instead, think about what you want your days to look like in the future and focus on making that happen today.

It’s a lot easier to make decisions that align with our true wants and desires when we separate ourselves from the present moment. Instant gratification is what we want in the moment, almost always, so it takes some separation to be able to see what we want for our future selves.

Becoming fit, writing a novel, waking up early. These are all things that take some planning, dedication and forethought. But it’s really easy to skip the gym, procrastinate through a writing session, or hit snooze in the moment, when competing things like comfort and entertainment are far more enticing.

The decisions we make prior to doing something compared to decisions we make in the moment are often different. We might want to start eating nutritious foods and work out at the gym every night. But when it comes to the afternoon when you should be going to the gym and you’re invited to your friends house for dinner and they are having pizza and ice cream, those thoughts you had for yourself might just go out the window.

That is not to say you shouldn’t have a fun night with your friends! I would highly recommend a pizza night! It is just important to note that we can’t solely rely on will power in the moment.

It’s one thing to practice mindfulness and be present and experience every moment, but that doesn’t mean we have to make our decisions in the moment. It’s far more effective and practical to make decisions for our future selves. Decisions that will make our future selves happy.

When you start your day, if you think about your future self hoping into bed at night, about to turn off the light, what could you do throughout the day that is going to make them happy? What is going to have made them feel proud of their day? Even better, when you go to bed at night, think about your future self the following day. What do you want for them?